The day that I found out I was pregnant left me feeling with so many different emotions, happy, scared, anxious, and sad. When I go back to my younger days I couldn’t wait to have a baby because its something I can call my own, someone who would always love me for me, never give up on me when I fail or give up on myself just like my mother. As a teenager I lost my mom from a heart attack and after that I felt like there was nobody there who could care for me and watch out for me like I needed them to. When I lost my mom I felt the only way I could feel her love again was to have a child because I knew they were the only one who could love me like she did because I was their mom. Determined to get pregnant was my mission because I needed to feel that love again.
Finally on FEBRUARY 12 the day I found out I was pregnant was the best day ever, or so I thought it was… I told my boyfriend the great news, and I thought he would be more shocked and scared than I was because we had just started dating. With me I didn’t care cause I wanted a child ASAP because I was yearning for a love that only my mom gave and I knew for sure my child could give me. I told my family and they were feeling the same way he was but more upset than anything because they felt I wasn’t in the proper situation, and it all got to me. NOBODY was happy for me they were mostly disappointed in me because I wasn’t in a good financial situation. I started thinking about everybody else’s opinion and started agreeing with it, and decided I didn’t need to have a baby right now because I barely new my boyfriend, didn’t have any money to support my child,  I had no family to support me, and com to think about it my life wasn’t in the perfect situation.
 On April 17th 2010 I went to the clinic and ended my day of being your mother. That was the worse day of my life! I cant believe I did something so horrible to my child, someone I have been waiting so long to meet and love. I let other peoples thoughts and feelings overpower my owns. I’m so sorry I ended your life before it even started. When you think about it I would be a horrible mother especially to kill you, I am a MURDERER and don’t deserve nothing so loving and innocent as you. PLEASE FORGIVE ME!

FRM: your poor excuse of a mother